Search Results "Feelings"
I Hope Her Hair Doesn’t Fall Out Again
Yaeli Efrat’s remission from cancer ended and her mother shares her feelings.
True Kindness - #2 - Overcoming Negative Feelings
What should we do when someone who is not normal asks us for help? What profound lesson can we learn from annoying people? Rebbetzin Yemima Mizrachi explains what true kindness really means
How can I accept my husband’s daughters?
I am writing on behalf of married friends who married six months ago after they were together two years. The husband has 13 year old and 6 year old daughters from his first wife, and his present wife is not very fond of the girls. I explained to her that they are just young girls and she has to overcome her feelings, but for some reason she finds it difficult. How can I explain this to her in a way that will penetrate her heart? She is a person with faith and a rabbi’s answer will definitely help. Thanks.
I'm 21 years old, and baruch Hashem (thank G-d) I also accepted a marriage proposal and I'm getting married (there is no date yet). My issue starts with the fact that I have a little problem in understanding why we should get married and have children, since our world is full of crises and bringing children to the world is a matter of a personal interest only, so that we can feel satisfaction and a sense of continuation. But we don't know what our life will be like in future, what our children's fate will be, and certainly we can't be with them all their lives to help them. I know that this is warped and incorrect thinking, and that's why I'm turning to you, so that you can change my thinking, because I have great doubts about this matter. In spite of my thinking, I have no doubt that I will fulfill it, since this is the Creator's commandment, and there is no commandment that is not good. Also, I keep hearing from people that are close to me that I shouldn't get married young, I should go on trips… Just to start involvement with payments, mortgage, it affects work, it means not enjoying life, and since there will be many crises, the best age to get married is 25, etc. G-d willing, the wedding will be in a year's time. Every time they knock down my motivation. I will appreciate getting advice, because I know this thinking is not good and not right.
The Practical Connection Between This World and The Next
Shalom Rabbi My sister passed away a month ago and I wanted to ask what the daily connection is between this world and the next. Does she see us? And does it even matter? And beyond the blessings and saying Kadish (the prayer for the deceased) how are we connected and how does that translate into reality? (It is very difficult for me to transfer these feelings into a question) How can I know if she is ok, or if she is G-d forbid, not?
Sexual identity problem
My 20 year old daughter told me that she had a sexual identity problem and she is attracted to girls and has "friend-spouses.“ Of course I was in total shock, considering she graduated from a religious high school and thinks of herself as a religious girl. I tried to tell her that this is a very serious prohibition, but she claims that the prohibition is only between males and not females. I tried to talk her out of it and she tells me that it is not her choice, that’s just the way she is. What am I to do? I'm at a loss and feel very stressed about it. How can I help her?
Religious kindergarten education
I know that in many religious kindergartens, they teach the children to keep the commandments, give charity, respect adults, do good deeds, etc. (It’s a pity it is not done in all kindergartens.) This is an important thing but there is one thing I encountered which bothered me. A religious child of about 4 approached a person who he knows is not religious (he is traditional, and does not wear a kippa) and told him, 'You are a goy [non-Jew]' since he saw that he wasn’t wearing a kippa. Can it be that they are teaching in kindergartens that secular Jews are un-Jewish or is this a specific case in a particular kindergarten? There are many secular Jews who are charitable, have a good heart and keep many commandments applying to their fellow man, like showing concern for others, etc. Can it be that a kindergarten teacher taught children that secular Jews are gentiles?? After all, the most basic thing in the Torah is respecting others and avoiding offending others’ feelings. Thank you very much.
Hanukkah of the Conscience
Human beings were born with a conscience and a moral intuition. If a person ignores his inner moral voice, he will eventually start feeling feelings of guilt. Rabbi Glaser discusses the history of the aversion to the conscience and its connection to Hanukkah
Relationships - Anger and Jealousy
Shalom to you Rabbi! I am a kallah teacher here in London and recently a young woman was discussing the subject of jealousy with me. A week ago she sent me a written list of questions and an explanation of her problem and here it is: “I can’t control myself. I have heard many lectures on the topic but I still can’t shake the jealousy. I do not enjoy the feeling of being jealous and I never experienced this before in my life…and why am I actually jealous? Until a few months ago over the past 5 years I was in touch with a guy, he loved me very much and of course I loved him also. He even wanted us to get married but he knew that his parents would not agree because we are relatives. We both knew that our relationship would have to end eventually. Baruch Hashem a few months ago he found a good shidduch and got married. When I see him I am angry and I can hardly speak to him and would prefer not to see him…and of course I am jealous of his wife. I am normally the type that loves everyone and lives in peace and when I get in a fight with someone it really bothers me. I really want to overcome this anger and jealousy and truly be happy for him but how can I? What am I supposed to tell her and how? Respectfully, Talia Bar
The Secret Life of Plants - Do Plants have Feelings?
In 1970, the leading Russian newspaper Pravda announced in an explosive headline: “Plants Speak. Yes, They Shout! Only to Avoid Embarrassing People Do They Keep Their Pain to Themselves.” The Talmud Mentioned this 1500 Years ago!
May a child be cross with his parents?
My second son is almost 23 years old, married with no children. He is chareidi and we are more liberal. He became more religious and is now a very religious Litvak. It has been almost a month that he isn’t talking to us, he and his wife completely broke off contact. He is angry with us for various reasons, but it is not related to our observance. On the contrary, we have great respect for him and help him out. Now that it’s before Yom Kippur, I’m wondering, as his mother, do I have to ask for his forgiveness? I forgave him in advance for his childish and problematic behavior, and I am not making a big deal of it, I want to believe that hopefully things will work out in the future, and I do not want to hold any bad feelings and complaints against him in my heart. I forgive him wholeheartedly. Do I still need to ask him for forgiveness? I believe with all my heart that I didn’t do anything bad to him, and that his reaction is very wrong. I would appreciate your quick reply.
I am seeking advice on how to mediate a conflict between a father and son in my synagogue in Seagate. Here is the son’s question: We are three brothers, and I am the middle child, age 29, married for three years. My dear parents decided to help me and my brothers buy homes for ourselves. They have worked hard all their lives, saving penny after penny. They divided up the money as such: I got married first and I received 480,000 shekels, a respectable amount to be sure, and for which I am very grateful. I should mention that my wife’s parents also gave us 420,000 shekels. Soon after, my younger brother who learns in kollel and who got married after me was given 1,200,000 shekels, and his wife’s parents are not helping out at all. The shidduch was made with the condition that my parents would give 600,000 shekels, and they have actually received double that amount. Recently my parents offered my older brother who is not yet married half a million shekels, and when he actually marries they will probably give him more. I very much appreciate the help my parents are giving me, and I don’t take it for granted. I should mention that my parents are not wealthy people. My question is if the distribution of the money is fair. Am I just supposed to accept the fact that my brother received three times more money that I did (even my older brother was surprised at this). We understand that he is learning in kollel and doesn’t earn much, and we have only admiration for the Torah world and those who learn. This situation has caused a lot of tension between us brothers. My parents claim that the apartment they bought for my brother was a once-in-a-lifetime deal that they could not pass up. I disagree – my brother and his wife could have started off with a smaller apartment. What should I do?
How to make the transition from wearing pants to skirts
I would be really happy if, before anything else, you could explain to me why a woman should wear a skirt. I've already started taking tzni'ut (modesty) upon myself, but I'm still wavering between pants and skirts. I will be happy if you can give me chizuk (strength) and let me understand alone to choose skirts.
Changing personality traits
I apologize in advance for the long question and I hope that I manage to explain myself well. Thanks in advance for answering. I heard in a speech that the personality traits that each person has, that is exactly how Hashem made them. If I'm shy- great, that's what I'm supposed to be... and if I'm outgoing- that's also great... Basically, these are my traits and this is what is best for me to be. He also mentioned external appearance. Once I was very shy, really a doormat to everyone. I never expressed myself and never initiated. I just went along with everything and didn't have much confidence in myself. Eventually I realized that if I want to accomplish anything in life, I had to learn to speak up and stop being afraid of my own shadow, and stop obsessing about what everyone else thinks about me. So I started venturing out of my comfort zone and coming out of my shell a bit. Soon I couldn't recognize myself- I even became confused about my identity. Slowly I started becoming confident, assertive, and unafraid of failure. (Previously I didn't have confidence with girls, for example, but now I can't even understand what I was scared of.) Now I wonder if it was blasphemous to go against what Hashem gave me. If He made me shy, how could I go and change it? It's as if I said, “It's not good for me like this, I want something different”, right? How can I say to Hashem, “Look, thanks for what you gave me, but I prefer to be more assertive... you made me too submissive.” I hope that I explained myself well, and I'm sorry for running on for so long. I even considered going for professional help for this issue.
Hanging on to The Yom Tov Experience
As the Holiday season subsides we tend to feel feelings of longing and hope. How can we hang on to the season’s inspirations?
How to fix the personality trait of an evil eye
They always write about how careful one has to be from the evil eye, how to cancel its effect, and how to get away from it, but how does one fix it if one has it?? One who already has an evil eye, and harms people and scares them ... How can he get out of it?? Isn’t it something you can not control? One who has this — is there anything he can do?? Is there no turning back ??
How to Make the Switch from Pants to Skirts
Dear Rabbi, I’d appreciate if, before everything, you’d give me an explanation why it’s the woman who has to wear a skirt. I’ve already begun to accept upon myself the laws of modesty, but I’m still wavering between skirts and pants. I’d appreciate if you can help strengthen my resolve and lead me to understand on my own that I should choose skirts.
I Began to Observe the Sabbath and Found It Takes Care of Me
Many surfers continue to share their feelings with their fellow Jews ahead of the World Sabbath celebrated in October
Clarity and Calmness in Marriage
How should we express our feelings to our husbands with clarity and calmness? If we want to have the power to genuinely modify our feelings in order to make our lives happier, the first step is to face and accept those feelings
Careful Criticism in Marriage
What's the ideal way to express your hurt feelings to your husband?