Concepts in JudaismMarriage

To Give In, Give In and Give In

Here are 10 choice quotes from Rabbi Shteinman on various challenges of our generation.

1. “Give in, give in and give in- those are the 3 things people should do for a happy marriage, for every possible interpersonal problem stems from egoism which is rooted in haughtiness.

2. How do you calm down anger? At the time there were many tragedies people approached Rabbi Shteinman and asked him what they should do. Rabbi Shteinman answered them: “Who knows the ways of G-d? But it is simple that strengthening f Torah and fear of G-din the community will remove anger from upon us.”

3. How should we deal with disputes? An editor of a Torah journal once asked Rabbi Shteinman if it’s worthwhile to review a dispute between Torah giants that happened hundreds of years ago. Rabbi Shteinman answered adamantly: “Why should we poke our heads between these great mountains? Will it benefit our fear of G-d? For Torah research there is no shortage of material in our giant treasure house of Jewish Torah literature to focus on other interesting things.”

4. What about fighting for an inheritance? A rabbi once asked for strength to avoid a dispute he was swept into. Rabbi Shteinman asked back: “Does anyone need strength for this? Cain and Abel fought about dividing up the world. They wanted to inherit their father when he was still alive and they both died before their father did. There’s even an opinion in the commentaries that they were fighting about who would have the Holy Temple in their portion in order to serve G-d! We learn from all this that even a dispute on spirituality on the place of the holy temple can bring to murder G-d forbid!”

5. Fear of G-d:  Rabbi Shteinman commented that if a person already prayed and is studying when a synagogue is praying he needn’t answer Amen to their blessings for he is learning. However if he does hear them blessing he should say Amen for fear of G-d.

6. How to merit divine assistance: “Anyone who has compassion on creations will have the compassion of heaven upon him.” Rabbi Shteinman says: “This is something that can bring great divine assistance.”

7. Desist from work a few minutes prior to the Shabbat: “It’s proper to try and desist from all activities forbidden on Shabbat a bit earlier.” Rabbi Shteinman reiterates the holiness of the Shabbat and that it’s the source of all blessing.  

8. G-d shakes us up so we pray to him: “We should know that we sometimes believe that G-d will help and nothing is going to happen but we fail to understand that sometimes there is a decree from heaven, G-d forbid. But G-d is compassionate and caring and he desires our prayers, therefore He shakes us up all along the way. The main thing is to pray to Him. And we should know that we don’t just pray in times of trouble rather if a person doesn’t pray then G-d forbid the trouble may come to get him to pray, as our sages said: A person should always pray before any troubles come.”

9. What is more dangerous than the Iranian threat? “Only through the merit of Torah learning especially when it’s learned under poor conditions and stress do we have any merit to exist in this world against all of our enemies who want to destroy us. Our entire existence is miraculous, illogical and against all odds, a sheep surrounded by 70 wolves. Only because of the merit of Torah learning our enemies can’t harm us. Therefore we should be more troubled by any threat to harm the status of Torah students learning Torah far more than the Iranian threat.”

10. “What is the mitzvah of our generation” Rabbi David AbuChatzeira asked Rabbi Shteinman? Rabbi Shteinman answered: “To strengthen ourselves very much in faith and trust in G-d alone and not in people.”


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