Jewish Law and the Sanctity of Life: Halachic Guidance in Tragic Circumstances

It is important to recognize and publicize the extreme severity of the grave sin of a person who harms their soul and commits suicide. Even if a person suffers tremendous anguish such as poverty, afflictions, and pain like Iyov, it is forbidden to harm oneself. Rather, one must accept suffering with love, as it says: “You shall love the Lord your God… with all your might” (Devarim 6:5) — meaning: in every measure that Heaven measures out to you, whether good or difficult, one should give thanks.

Maimonides writes (Mishneh Torah, Laws of Blessings 10:3) that included in the commandment of profound love of God is thanking and praising Him even at a time of distress, with joy. Likewise, King David says: “Fortunate is the man whom You discipline, O God, and teach from Your Torah” (Tehillim 94:12). Solomon says: “Do not despise the discipline of the Lord… for whom the Lord loves He rebukes, as a father the son in whom he delights” (Mishlei 3:11–12).

The Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 222:3) teaches that what appears as “misfortune” for those who serve God can itself become their joy and good, because accepting Heaven’s decree with love becomes a form of serving God — and that service is itself a source of inner happiness. The Mishnah Berurah explains that suffering of the body or finances can serve as atonement for sins, so that one will not need to face harsher judgment later, as it says: “In order to afflict you and test you, to benefit you in your end” (Devarim 8:16).

A Midrash (Bereishit Rabbah 65:9) relates that until the days of Yitzchak, suffering did not exist, and Yitzchak requested that suffering enter the world so that people would be cleansed and not face strict judgment later. The Holy One said to him: “You have asked well — and I will begin with you,” as it says: “And it was when Yitzchak became old, and his eyes grew dim from seeing…” (Bereishit 27:1). David also says: “My flesh trembles from fear of You; I dread Your judgments” (Tehillim 119:120), expressing the desire to be purified rather than live in fear of later judgment.

A person who destroys himself, thinking to escape suffering, is profoundly mistaken. Where can a person flee from the Creator? In adding wrongdoing to wrongdoing by harming innocent life, even one’s own, the sin is described as extremely severe, and the person forfeits opportunities of atonement that would otherwise exist.

One who destroys himself intentionally (meaning, with clear awareness and not in a state of mental confusion) is considered a great transgressor. The soul is not private property; it belongs to the Creator, Who entrusted it to the person, as it says: “Behold, all souls are Mine” (Yechezkel 18:4). A person has no right to lay a hand upon it. God will hold a person accountable, as it says: “Your blood of your lives I will demand… from the hand of man I will demand the soul of man” (Bereishit 9:5). 

Customs and Mourning Practices

There is no need to pour out water in the neighborhood of a person who destroyed himself (as explained earlier in the source being quoted).

The Blessing “Dayan HaEmet”

One does not recite “Blessed is the True Judge” over the death of a person who destroyed himself. Even in a case of uncertainty, where mourning practices may be observed out of doubt, this blessing is still not recited, because it was instituted to affirm God’s judgment when He takes a soul in justice, whereas here the death was brought about by the person against God’s will. And in blessings, when there is doubt, we are lenient to avoid a possibly unnecessary blessing.

Aninut (the pre-burial status)

Relatives are not considered onenim (in the strict pre-burial status) in this case, and they continue observing mitzvot and reciting blessings as usual — based on layered halachic doubts discussed in the original sources.

Handling and Public Mourning

Because the act is viewed as an exceptionally grave transgression, some classic halachic sources state that one does not treat such a death in the same way as other deaths regarding certain mourning expressions and communal practices (washing, formal eulogies, specific liturgical formulas, etc.). The text emphasizes that standard burial still takes place, but certain public elements may differ, depending on circumstances and rulings.

A Penitent Person Overwhelmed by Guilt

If someone was deeply religious or repented sincerely, and out of great anguish mistakenly thought that ending their life would “help” their repentance, the sources argue that this is a tragic error and does not necessarily place the person in the halachic category of one who acted with full, clear intent. In such a case, burial and mourning may proceed as for other Jewish deaths.

A Person Suffering Great Affliction

If someone endured severe suffering and harmed themselves, even though the act remains forbidden, there are cases where halachah urges judging favorably — often assuming a lack of full clarity, knowledge, or stable mental state. The text stresses consulting a qualified halachic authority, who should incline toward kindness.

Mental Incapacity

A person who lacked halachic responsibility due to mental incapacity is treated as any other deceased person.

A Minor

A child below bar/bat mitzvah age is treated as any other deceased person, since their capacity for full responsibility is not assumed.

Coercion / Duress

If the act occurred under coercion or extreme duress, halachah may not treat it as “intentional” in the strict sense, and mourning practices are not withheld. The text brings examples and responsa that discuss such scenarios.

Human Dignity and Family Honor

If a respected family fears that public refusal to mourn will create humiliation and disgrace, some authorities permit mourning because human dignity (kavod habriyot) is very great. The text also cites opinions that even where there is no obligation to mourn, there may not be a prohibition against mourning if the family chooses to do so, especially to avoid public shame.

The Power of Repentance

If a person regretted what they did, confessed, and repented before death — and especially if they sought rescue, mourning practices are not withheld, because nothing stands in the way of repentance.

Elevating the Soul

Even though the transgression is described as extremely severe, the text stresses that the children and family should still do what they can for the person’s soul-elevation, by saying Kaddish, memorial prayers, Torah and Mishnah study, and charity to the poor — so that the person may receive mercy and spiritual benefit.

It cites sources (including the Chatam Sofer and others) arguing that we do not abandon a soul — prayer, charity, and merit can help, and even those described as lacking a “portion” may still benefit from divine charity and mercy in the World to Come.

Rescue is Mandatory

If someone endangered their life in this way (for example, by ingesting something harmful), the text rules that one must exert every effort to save them — even overriding Shabbat if needed, and one may not listen to the person if they protest rescue.

The Words of Maran HaRishon LeTzion, Rabbi Ovadia Yosef

In one of his lessons, Maran HaRishon LeTzion Rabbi Ovadia Yosef said:

A person who takes their own life tragically thinks they are freeing themselves from suffering, but there, the suffering is far more severe. We must be exceedingly careful with this.

Does a person think that they will escape suffering? There, the suffering is far more severe. One must be cautious. There are people who do not know what takes place in those realms. Sadly, I know of people who, over some disappointment or pain, do this to themselves, thinking that in this way they will be rescued from suffering. How mistaken! The Ramban writes that even all of suffering throughout a person’s lifetime is not equal to even a single hour of Gehinnom. One must accept suffering with love and know that everything is for the good, from God, blessed be He.

We ache deeply for such people. They did not know and did not understand; they are not to be blamed — no one explained to them the severity of this prohibition: “But your blood of your lives I will demand” (Bereishit 9:5). It is more severe than murder. If a person murders another and is broken by what they did, they can spend their life in repentance, because nothing stands in the way of repentance — even though they destroyed a life in Israel, which is like destroying an entire world. But a person who harms themselves, when will they have time to repent? How much one must warn people who do not know these matters; it pains us greatly.

There was a man who used to pray with us every Shabbat, would be called to the Torah, and enjoyed the prayers. Suddenly, a destructive spirit overcame him, and he died by his own hand. This results from not knowing the severity of the prohibition, from thinking that one’s soul belongs to oneself. God brought you into the world. He is the God of the spirits of all flesh; the soul is Yours, the body is Your work — what right does a person have to do such a thing to himself?

All of this must be explained calmly and clearly so that people will know. Our sages did not say these things for nothing: one who intentionally takes their own life is treated differently in certain laws of mourning — there are restrictions on eulogies and standard mourning practices, and they are not buried in the same manner as others. This must be told to the public so they will hear and fear, and know the halachot.

People who have not learned Torah think this is a way to be saved from suffering. Do state schools teach that there is a World to Come, the survival of the soul, and that one will give an accounting before the Holy One, blessed be He?! They think there is only this world, like Esav, who did not believe in the World to Come. Yaakov would tell him there is a World to Come, and Esav would mock him; therefore Esav said, “Behold, I am going to die — so why do I need the birthright?” and our sages said he denied the fundamental belief. One who does not believe in the World to Come is, in a sense, continuing Esav’s path.

Therefore every person must know that this world is fleeting. Fortunate is the person who goes to the next world with mitzvot and good deeds; they receive their reward and are placed in Gan Eden among the righteous. And if there is suffering, they understand: “For whom the Lord loves, He rebukes, as a father the son he favors” (Mishlei 3:12). Is anyone free of sin? “There is no righteous man on earth who does good and never sins” (Kohelet 7:20). One should rejoice that any cleansing comes in this world, so they will not be ashamed in the next world among the righteous. Sometimes a person wonders, “What did I do wrong?” Know that it is for your good and for your ultimate happiness, so that you may enter the next world purified, without further cleansing needed.