The Tree of Knowledge and the Tree of Life: Why We Confuse Our Actions With Who We Are

According to the Kabbalists and the teachings of sod (the mystical tradition), there is an additional reason we often feel that we are “bad,” or that we are a confusing mix of good and bad. This began with Adam HaRishon. When Adam ate from the Tree of Knowledge, he brought evil into our inner world.

Rabbi Chaim of Volozhin explains in Nefesh HaChaim: “It was not that his choice [Adam’s choice to sin with the Tree of Knowledge] was because the forces of evil were included within him; for he was completely upright, consisting only of the ordered powers of holiness… pure good, without any mixture or leaning toward the opposite at all. And the forces of evil stood to the side, as something separate outside of him. And he had free will to enter into the forces of evil, Heaven forbid — like a person who has free will to put his hand into fire.” (Sha’ar 1, ch. 6)

Before the Sin: Evil Was Outside

In Adam HaRishon there was no inner evil; evil was an external reality. He recognized good as good and evil as evil. Because there was no inner “bad” inside him, there was nothing to confuse him into thinking that what he saw outside — something harmful, might actually be good.

As Rabbi Chaim’s example suggests, evil for Adam was like fire: obviously you don’t stick your hand into it.

If we look at ourselves, we can easily find examples of things we knew were not good for us, and yet we did them anyway. Afterward we say, “I knew I shouldn’t have…” But in the moment something blinds us, and we convince ourselves it’s not really bad.

A person on a strict diet would not eat chocolate if it tasted disgusting and made them nauseous. And if a cigarette killed the smoker within twenty seconds, most people probably wouldn’t smoke.

After the Sin: The Tempter Moved Inside

Rabbi Chaim continues: “Therefore, when the Sitra Achra (the “other side” of holiness) wished to cause him to sin, the serpent needed to come from outside to entice him — not as it is now, when the impulse that tempts a person is within the person himself, and it appears to him that he himself is the one who wants and is drawn to the sin, not that something outside is tempting him. And through his sin… the forces of evil became mixed within him… This is what our Sages said (Shabbat 146a): when the serpent came upon Chavah, it injected impurity into her — meaning, within her. And since then it caused great confusion in human actions… sometimes good and sometimes evil, constantly flipping from good to evil and from evil to good.”

So the “battle” shifted: not only “I see evil outside and avoid it,” but “I feel pulled from inside, and it can even feel like me.”

Why Would Adam Want to Eat It at All?

If Adam had no inner evil, why did he want the fruit?

One explanation is that the Tree is called “the Tree of Knowledge of good and evil.” Adam wanted to “repair” evil in the world — to elevate it and include everything within holiness, bringing even what is distant back to its connected, sacred place.

But the goal does not sanctify forbidden means. He had been commanded not to eat from that Tree. By eating, he brought evil into himself and fell. Instead of elevating evil, he fell into the mixed confusion of good-and-evil.

Chazal describe this as Adam having “eaten an unripe fruit” — something not yet ready, not in the right time, not within the right boundaries. This is why “the ends don’t justify the means.” You can’t, for example, create “social justice” by stealing from the rich and giving to the poor (sorry, Robin).

The Real “Fall”: Identifying With the Bad

For our topic, the fall is this: identifying with the good and the bad — feeling that if I make a mistake, it proves that I am bad.

Identifying with the bad is like leaving rotten fruit in the refrigerator. If it stays there, the good fruit will rot too.

If someone steals from the bank near his home once every few months, and you ask him what he is, he’ll say, “I’m a thief.” He won’t say, “I’m almost not a thief,” or “I generally don’t steal.” The bad overshadows the good.

The fall is forgetting that I am pure good at my core. “The Tree of Knowledge of good and evil” — once we ate from it, evil entered our inner world, and we mistakenly identify both good and bad as parts of our essence.

The Soul Stays Pure

This is a distortion and a mistake, because the human soul remains pure, always connected to its clear and pure Source.

But because we have layers, and because for most of us the soul is not constantly “revealed” — meaning we usually feel the lacks tied to the body and the lower levels of the psyche more than the inner radiance of the soul, we identify with lack and with evil.

First, we need to separate my actions from who I truly am. That does not mean ignoring actions. If I mistakenly took my friend’s book, it doesn’t mean I should say, “You’re good, you’re perfect,” and keep the book.

It means I should say: “You are good, but the book belongs to Yossi. Return it.”

“The World of Action” and the Trap of External Worth

This world is called the “World of Action.” There are higher spiritual “worlds” associated with emotion, thought, will, and unity.

On a homiletic level, you can say: because our world is the world of action, “importance” here is often defined by external doing rather than inner essence.

(Aside: all spiritual and physical worlds exist simultaneously; as we develop awareness, we can touch deeper inner dimensions. If we merit connecting physical action to spiritual purpose, we are fortunate. Good is our portion in this world and in the next.)

But when we don’t connect action to purpose, we’re left with disconnected doing and definitions of worth based on externals, not inner essence:

• If I’m a pilot, lawyer, or doctor, I’m “important.”

• If I sweep streets, I’m “not important.”

What does external work have to do with the light of the soul?

Moshe Rabbeinu was a shepherd. Great Tannaim and Amoraim in the Mishnah and Gemara were blacksmiths, shoemakers, and laborers, and at the same time towering spiritual giants.

A Story: The Sadigura Rebbe Sweeping in Tel Aviv

In Israel’s early years, someone who walked near the Great Synagogue on Allenby Street in Tel Aviv late on Independence Day night before dawn, might have noticed an elderly Jew sweeping the synagogue courtyard.

Who was he? Why was he sweeping so early? Maybe he was poor and homeless? Maybe the synagogue officials were doing him kindness by letting him sweep to earn a little money?

Not many knew that this Jew was actually the Sadigura Rebbe, leader of the Sadigura chassidut — thousands strong, and heir to a dynasty descending from Rabbi Yisrael of Ruzhin, a disciple of the Baal Shem Tov.

What was his secret?

During World War II, when the Nazis began occupying Austria, they entered Vienna and humiliated the Jews. Rabbi Avraham Yaakov, the Sadigura Rebbe, was their leader, and so he became a central target. They forced him to sweep the street while humiliating and degrading him.

While he was forced to sweep, he whispered: “Master of the Universe, I accept upon myself that if I merit being saved and reaching the Land of Israel, I will sweep its streets with joy.”

Later the soldiers shoved a Nazi flag into his hand and ordered him to climb and place it on a tall building. In his heart the Rebbe repeated: “Master of the Universe, I will yet merit raising the flag of Israel high in the Land of Israel.”

What we see from the outside does not necessarily reflect what is happening within. What a person does in life does not define his inner essence. External culture tries to teach the opposite: if you succeed in career or appearance, you’ve “made it.” And if not?

Tree of Life and Tree of Knowledge: The Order Matters

Let’s return to the Tree of Knowledge and the Tree of Life and understand how they connect to our lives.

The Zohar (Bereishit 35) writes that if Adam had eaten from the Tree of Life, he could also have eaten from the Tree of Knowledge. Why?

Because the problem wasn’t the Tree of Knowledge itself, but that eating from it separated Adam from the Tree of Life. If he had also eaten from the Tree of Life, he could have eaten from the Tree of Knowledge.

You can even infer this from the verses: God says, “From every tree of the garden…” (meaning: he was expected to eat broadly, not only from the Tree of Knowledge). But regarding the Tree of Knowledge He says “from it,” implying: when it’s only “from it,” that’s the problem. If it were “from every [tree],” it would not be the same problem.

The issue is the order of events: Adam ate from the Tree of Knowledge before the Tree of Life. What is the emotional/psychological difference between them?

The Tree of Life: Inner Vitality and Unconditional Worth

The Malbim explains that the Tree of Life was literally what its name implies: its fruit had the property that whoever ate from it would not experience death and would live forever, because it would preserve the body’s foundational life-force (“the moisture” that renews through nourishment) so it would not diminish, weaken, or age.

Like a closed oil system in a massive machine: if the oil doesn’t leak, the machine keeps running. In the metaphor, the “oil” is the human being’s root vitality — something we are born with that gradually declines over life.

(Aside: Traditional Chinese medicine speaks about “jing,” the “essence” — a basic life force a person is born with, which gradually diminishes. Unlike “qi,” which can be replenished, “jing” is harder to renew.)

The Malbim continues: God did not intend that a person cross seas and distant islands to chase gold, silver, and pearls, building grand houses and wearing luxury, while struggling endlessly for externals. The divine intention was that man eat from the Tree of Life and live forever in Gan Eden, occupied with insight and true understanding.

But human folly twisted his path: he chose to eat from the Tree of Knowledge, which awakened desire for an illusory good that is sweet in the moment, but harmful in the end. That awakening led to the “leaking” of the root vitality until death.

The Tree of Life represents staying “inside” — rooted, nourished, and connected, rather than searching for substitutes “outside.”

From the soul’s perspective, the Tree of Life tells us: You are good no matter what, regardless of your actions. Not because actions don’t matter, but because your core worth doesn’t depend on proving yourself externally.

Like a father telling his child: “I love you, my child, regardless of your behavior. Whether right now you’re acting in a way I approve of or not, I love you because you are my child.” That doesn’t eliminate education or boundaries, but illustrates that the love is unconditional.

The Tree of Knowledge: Illusory Good and External Validation

The Malbim says that the Tree of Knowledge awakens bodily desires and the inner images of jealousy, craving, and honor — the pleasures of the world, which then create “knowledge of good and evil,” pushing a person into the pursuit of illusory good, with harm attached at its heel.

In simple terms:

• Your good isn’t inside.

• It’s not connected to who you are.

• It’s outside.

• Go chase it outside.

Chazal say: “Jealousy, desire, and honor remove a person from the world” (Avot 4:21). On an inner level, they remove a person from his own world — from his inner life. They push him outward into exile of the soul, searching for comfort from the outside.

When Discipline Destroys a Child — and When It Builds

Once we understand “Tree of Life first,” we can understand something very practical: A child who deeply feels that his parents love him and protect him unconditionally (Tree of Life) can receive limits and guidance (Tree of Knowledge) without feeling that those limits threaten his basic worth.

Then the correction addresses behavior: “Do not hit your younger siblings,” without attacking identity: “You are bad.”

In the opposite scenario however, when a child doesn’t feel naturally loved and good, every rebuke can trigger despair and collapse. This is common among at-risk or delinquent youth who feel hopeless: “Nothing good will come from me anyway,” so they drop all responsibility.

Because:

• If I identify as bad, doing bad feels “consistent.”

• If I identify as good, doing bad becomes much harder.

As Ma’or VaShemesh writes: “If not for Adam HaRishon’s sin of eating from the Tree of Knowledge, he would have clung to the Tree of Life and eaten and lived forever. But by eating from the Tree of Knowledge, evil became mixed into good, and good into evil.” (Ma’or VaShemesh, Mishpatim, “V’nireh”)

From the book “Sod HaNekudah HaTovah” (“The Secret of the Good Point”), by Ran Weber — writer, therapist, and workshop facilitator in the spirit of Chassidut.