Halachot and Customs
Lighting Shabbat Candles When Visiting Parents' Home
Question
If I am a guest on Shabbat at my mother-in-law's house, may I recite the blessing when lighting the candles, or is there a concern of a blessing in vain? And does the same ruling apply when I am a guest at my parents' home? Thank you.
Answer
Greetings, If you have a private room that others do not use when you are a guest, according to Sephardic custom, you should light the candles in that room and recite the blessing over this lighting, ensuring that the candles remain lit until you go to sleep. If you recite the blessing over candles lit near the homeowner, there is a concern of a blessing in vain. However, according to Ashkenazic custom, you may light with a blessing as usual next to the homeowner.
Sources: The Sephardic custom follows what is explained in the Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 263:8). When two or three household members eat together in one place, some say each recites a blessing over their own menorah, while others hesitate; therefore, it is proper to be stringent in cases of doubts in blessings and only one should recite the blessing. Accordingly, it is written in Or LeTzion, Part 2 (Chapter 18, Response 6) that a woman who is a guest on Shabbat at her mother-in-law's or elsewhere, if she has a private room not used by others, even for taking items from the cabinets, should light in that room and recite the blessing on this lighting. If she lights in the same place as the homeowner, she may not recite the blessing due to the dispute and the principle of leniency in cases of doubtful blessings. Likewise, see Chazon Ovadia Shabbat, Part 1 (page 154), that when a man and his wife stay with his parents and there is a private bedroom for sleeping, the mother-in-law lights with a blessing in the dining room, and the daughter-in-law lights with a blessing in her room, making sure to provide enough oil in the candle to last until bedtime. However, the Rema comments that we do not practice this custom, as the Mishnah Berurah (sec. 37) also writes, but rather we follow the first opinion.
With blessing, Hillel Meirs
עברית
