Adar is Almost Here: Turning Up the Volume on Joy

We are standing at the threshold of Adar. Less than a week remains before the month that reshapes our inner atmosphere arrives. You can already feel it stirring. Something is shifting, something is asking to be awakened.

The Gemara in Tractate Taanit teaches that just as when the month of Av begins we lessen our joy, so when the month of Adar begins we increase it. From Rosh Chodesh Adar onward, joy is not optional. It is an avodah.

“When it begins” includes Adar I as well, and even the very first day of Rosh Chodesh, despite the fact that it still belongs, technically, to the end of Shevat. The work of joy does not wait.

And here the inner child asks a very honest question.

Master of the Universe, if I really had access to a joy button, why would I wait for Adar? Why not use it right now, in the middle of heavy days, tired mornings, and moments of sadness? Where is this button that suddenly raises the level of joy in the body?

And another question follows. If such a button exists, why are we told to press it specifically in Adar? Why not all year long? Is joy somehow inappropriate in other months?

And for us as parents, one more question. Even if we find this button within ourselves and learn how to use it, how do we pass it on to our children? Where is the joy button in those small bodies and tender souls?

Everyone Can Choose Joy

There is not a single person who does not have a joy button within them. For every one of us, it is available daily, placed before us again and again. It sits beside your Gemara, on your keyboard, next to your plate at the table.

You simply have to choose to use it.

What activates the button and allows joy to rise? Remove what blocks it, and joy begins to lift on its own, higher and higher.

There are two primary sources of sadness.

The first is an unsettled conscience, doing something you are not at peace with. That voice is not psychological noise. It is the divine soul within a person.

The second is a lack of simple, wholehearted faith in Hashem.

A person who knows they have acted wrongly cannot experience true joy, even if surrounded by comfort and pleasure. Often, they seek even more distractions to quiet the inner cry. To enter the space of joy, a person must clear their life of anything they are not at peace with, anything misaligned with the will of Hashem, anything that causes unjust pain to others.

After that clearing comes the strengthening of faith.

Believe that Hashem is all powerful and nothing is difficult for Him.
Believe that He loves you more than anyone else in your life and wants only your ultimate good.
Believe that He knows what is best for you better than you do, better than any expert or advisor.

This is a reliable path to genuine joy. You are a good person held in good hands. Even what appears difficult by your standards is trusted to be part of goodness unfolding.

Why Adar Then?

So why emphasize joy in Adar?

The question itself needs adjusting. We do not reserve joy for Adar alone. Rather, Adar and Nisan are months dedicated to strengthening and refining our capacity for joy. They are months of miracles for the Jewish people, as Rashi explains.

Each year, these months invite us to raise our baseline. Joy should grow year by year. At thirty three, one is meant to be more joyful than at thirty two. The button is pressed all year long. In Adar, we simply learn how to press it a little further.

Helping Children Live with Joy

And now the most important question. Where is the joy button in our children?

The answer is simple and demanding.

Children absorb joy or sadness primarily from their parents. A child raised in an atmosphere of heaviness will tend to carry that heaviness. A child raised among parents who approach life with joy, acceptance, and trust will naturally see the world through those eyes.

As adults, children may choose differently, but in childhood they imitate. Complaining parents raise complaining children. Grateful parents raise children who know how to see good.

A parent who wants joyful children does not begin by educating the child, but by educating themselves. Parent education, not child education. This is especially true in Adar.

Clear the table of what darkens the conscience. Strengthen simple faith in the Creator of the world. And joy follows, quietly but steadily. Children will follow it too.

May Hashem grant us the merit to do the inner work of this season fully, and to see our homes filled with enduring joy, together with our children, always.