Why a Smile in Prayer Changes Everything: A Story of Gratitude

Gratitude has the power to reshape reality. When a person chooses to focus on what is present instead of what is missing, something profound begins to shift. The following stories, shared by Rabbi Shlomo Levinstein, reveal how a smile in prayer and a language of thankfulness can open unexpected gates of blessing.

“I Almost Killed Your Ear”

Rabbi Ben Zion Seneh was in a very serious car accident, and his condition was deemed critical. By Hashem’s kindness, the doctors managed to stabilize him. He was flown abroad to rehabilitate his body and underwent continuous treatments. After a long rehabilitation, Rabbi Seneh reached a point where some parts of his body functioned more, and others less or not at all. He lost hearing in one ear, but the nerve was still alive and caused very severe infections. After a while, his doctor told him, “Look, this ear does not hear anyway, and the nerve is generating infections, which forces you to take large amounts of antibiotics for nothing. I think it is best to kill the nerve once and for all and be done with the infections.” Rabbi Seneh agreed, and he began the necessary tests before the procedure.

At that time, Rabbi Seneh was ill and weak, forced to leave his home country and settle abroad for a long period, all while undergoing complex medical treatments. During that period, something in the prayer wording caught his attention. We say, “Harchev picha va’amaleihu,” widen your mouth and I will fill it. Why does it say widen your mouth, he wondered. It could have said simply open your mouth.

His conclusion was striking. When does a person widen the mouth? When he smiles. To smile, you widen your mouth. In other words, the verse hints that when you praise Hashem, you should say it with a smile. And to speak with a smile, you must focus on all the good and kindness we have from Him, not on what is missing or what seems not good.

From that day, he and his wife began constantly noticing the good they had. True, he could not hear in one ear, but thank Hashem he could hear in the other. One leg he dragged, but with the other leg he walked well.

A Surprising Test Result

Days passed, and Rabbi Ben Zion came in for a special hearing test before destroying the nerve in the ear that was not hearing. He sat in a room with sound waves while the doctor operated computerized equipment from the next room. After a few minutes, the doctor burst into the room and shouted, “Ben Zion, in this ear you have close to 80 percent hearing! I almost killed your ear!” The doctor was stunned. “We have tested you dozens of times. That ear was completely deaf.”

And Rabbi Seneh smiled wide. That is the secret of smiling during prayer. That is the secret of Harchev picha va’amaleihu.

When the Shidduchim Stopped

Rabbi Seneh later told Rabbi Shlomo Levinstein that while living in the United States, he used his time to strengthen fellow Jews through lectures. After sharing his story in Monsey, he received a letter.

“I have nine children,” the man wrote. “Seven of them, baruch Hashem, I married off and they built beautiful homes. But we reached the last two, and now everything is stuck. Hardly any matches are suggested, and when they are, they are not suitable. I was sitting in your talk and heard about Harchev picha, about the abundance we have, and that when we emphasize it we merit salvations.

“I came home and said to my wife, we are constantly worrying about our two children who are stuck, and we have stopped noticing the kindness the Creator has given us with our seven married children. They are happy. There are grandchildren. Some are already learning Gemara and growing. So much nachas. Let us start speaking about the beauty and grace in our home.”

They decided to adopt language that focused on what they had, not on what they lacked.

Two months later, the man concluded his letter, “I am about to close a match for my second child.”

Rabbi Levinstein continued sharing this message in his own talks, passing along the insight that gratitude itself can open doors.

One Child Hid Thirteen Blessings

Several months later, Rabbi Levinstein received a phone call from a man who did not wish to identify himself.

“I am the father of 14 children. Wonderful children. But my seventh child began to slip. His peyos grew shorter until they disappeared. The road to the street was short. My home felt shattered. Chazal say in Masechet Berachot that a corrupt environment within one’s home is harder than the war of Gog and Magog.

“I was at your class and heard about smiling during prayer. It was the eve of Passover. I came home and told my wife, one child who is not following the path is blinding us to our 13 wonderful children. Some are already married with children of their own. How ungrateful we have become. Let us adopt positive speech. At the Seder, let us speak about the good.”

The Power of Words at the Seder

That Seder night, before Kiddush, he turned to his children, including the son who had drifted, and said, “Tonight we praise the Creator for what He did in Egypt, but we should also praise Him for what He does in our daily lives. We have a wonderful apartment with no mortgage.” He continued listing blessing after blessing, and his wife added her own. For a long hour, they counted the kindness Hashem shows them.

Soon after, the son who had stopped wearing a kippah came home with a small one. They did not comment. Over time, the kippah grew. On Shavuot, he asked to join his father at synagogue. They learned together. He said Tehillim, stayed up all night, and prayed Shacharit seriously. Slowly, he returned.

Later, when his father gently asked what brought about the change, the son answered, “All my life I saw you and Mom as good Jews who serve Hashem, but I also saw the struggles. It made me angry. Why do people who do His will suffer?

“Then on Seder night, I suddenly heard how much good you have. After that, it continued. I kept hearing about the kindness Hashem does for you. It penetrated deep inside me. I began to think about my own life. How I breathe, walk, see, hear. I felt ashamed. How can I act against Him when He gives me so much good?”

Rabbi Levinstein concludes that we, too, should accustom ourselves to thank Hashem for all the good He bestows upon us. May we merit abundant salvations from Above.

Rabbi Baruch Rosenblum teaches that Hashem loves to give to those who know how to say thank you.