From Social Anxiety to Confidence: A True Transformation Story

Eliyahu Shiri may be a well-known coach today, but as a teenager he suffered from social anxiety that made his life miserable. He lacked confidence, had low self-esteem, and did not even dare to raise his hand in class to answer a teacher’s question.

“I felt like I was investing endless energy and inner struggle into even the simplest social interactions I wanted to make,” he recalls. “I suffered a lot, and I really wanted to find a solution to that suffering. I started going to different libraries and looking for books about various strategies and methods for how to develop self-confidence, how to feel comfortable with yourself, and how to unlock self-expression and public speaking.”

One day, he came across a book about the power of self-hypnosis. That book, he says, changed his life.

A Personal Transformation

“I read the book and carefully applied everything it recommended. After a year of consistently practicing the exercises, I felt like I had become the most dominant person in my class. I had confidence, and I felt I could outperform people who didn’t work on personal development.

“Suddenly, people who disliked me became friends. People I used to fear became pleasant company. I felt like I had developed a kind of inner charisma. By the age of sixteen and a half, I had basically become an expert in self-improvement.”

Because of his new knowledge, whenever he heard about a problem from a friend or family member, he would suggest ways to address it through awareness of the mind and subconscious.

“There was a boy everyone in class used to laugh at because of his stutter and facial tics,” he recalls. “I helped him overcome it within two months. Before long, I found myself giving small group sessions at people’s homes, voluntarily, to those interested in what I had to say.”

Ten Years of Torah Study

After becoming religious, Shiri dedicated ten years to studying Torah. During those years, he says, he repeatedly recognized in Jewish sources the same psychological principles he had studied so intensely.

“I began doing extensive work collecting sources and meeting with Torah scholars. I believe that when people see models from Jewish sources, it influences them much more deeply. That’s how I built structured ideas and frameworks based on Judaism.”

The Idea of Influence from a Distance

“The method described in my book began after an article published in the United States about a clinical psychologist who managed to heal an entire ward of psychiatric patients remotely, through inner work he did on himself at home.

“He had learned this ability from a traditional healer who had cured his daughter of a severe illness. People read the article and sent it to us, asking whether something similar exists in Jewish sources.”

When Shiri read the story, he says, he was astonished. According to him, the idea of influencing others from a distance is explicitly found in Jewish teachings.

“These ideas are based on what Rabbi Israel Baal Shem Tov wrote in his commentary on the Torah. In Parashat Bereishit, he explains that if a person sees suffering or a flaw in someone else — whether spiritual or physical, it reflects something within his own soul. Since all of creation is unified, if I am shown another person’s problem, it means that in some way it exists within me as well.

“If I succeed in correcting that inner disturbance within myself, I can also bring about healing and improvement in the other person.”

He explains that there are four stages that describe how to address emotional blocks, distorted beliefs, illness, or inner struggles in another person, even without meeting them, and at the same time create change within oneself.

Real-Life Results

When asked whether the method has worked in practice, Shiri shares:

“I was giving a lecture in Bnei Brak when a religious woman stood up and spoke about her son, who suffered from severe tics that caused him great embarrassment and harmed his social standing.

“I explained the sources showing that parents can influence their child’s situation without even speaking to them, simply through inner work on themselves. She accepted the idea and said she would try.

“Three months later, I was speaking at a conference in Kinar Hotel, and she stood up in front of 600 women and shared that she and her husband had done the work. Their son’s condition improved to the point that all symptoms disappeared.”

He adds that whenever he asks audiences how many people have tried the method and experienced results, many hands are raised.

Addressing Skepticism

Shiri is aware that many people are skeptical of such claims.

“I address that skepticism from the very beginning,” he says. “If you want to be skeptical, let’s be professionally skeptical. I present all the doubts, and then I bring clear sources from Jewish tradition, along with supporting ideas from neuroscience and quantum physics.

“In the end, skeptics begin to understand that the separation between people is, in many ways, an illusion. We are all interconnected, and therefore we can influence one another.”