The Hidden Power of Humiliation: A Surprising Path to Blessing

Rabbi Elimelech Biderman shares a striking teaching from the Chatam Sofer.

Moshe Rabbeinu did not enter the Land of Israel. After 120 years of life, his time in this world had come to an end. According to this teaching, Moshe approached the Divine Throne and said:

“My years are over, but there are 600,000 people from the generation of the desert who died prematurely. Give me from their years.”

Hashem responded: “You cannot receive those years, because you said, ‘Listen now, you rebels.’ In those words, you did not overlook insult. Therefore, you cannot receive from those years.”

Why Pinchas Was Granted Long Life

The Chatam Sofer continues and explains that those extra years were instead given to Pinchas, son of Elazar, who lived for hundreds of years and is identified with Eliyahu HaNavi.

Why did Pinchas merit this?

Because he endured great humiliation. The tribes mocked him, as Rashi explains. They said: “Look at this man, whose grandfather fattened calves for idol worship, and now he dares to kill a leader of Israel.”

The Maharam Schick adds that no one in the world embodied the trait of overlooking insult like Pinchas. He knowingly placed himself into a situation where he would be ridiculed, and still went forward.

A Hidden Spiritual Remedy

Rabbi Biderman comments that when a person hears such a teaching, they begin to realize that humiliation itself is a powerful spiritual remedy.

Rabbi Chananya Cholak explains a similar idea based on the Ramak. When a person sins, Hashem seeks ways to help them atone.

A person is asked:
“Shall we give you suffering to cleanse your sins?”
“No!”

“Shall we affect your family?”
“Heaven forbid!”

“Shall we take your money?”
“Absolutely not!”

A person wants atonement, but without pain, loss, or hardship.

So what is the solution?

Humiliation.

The Benefit of Remaining Silent

The verse in Lamentations says: “He should offer his cheek to the one who strikes him and be filled with disgrace.”

This teaches that through accepting humiliation, a person gains immeasurably, without needing harsher forms of atonement.

The Mishnah also states: “I found nothing better for the body than silence.”

Without silence, the body may require suffering as a form of correction. Silence, however, protects a person and preserves both physical and spiritual well being.

A Powerful Story from Jerusalem

In Jerusalem, there was a woman known as “Yenteleh the crazy one.” She would stand in the streets and loudly insult passersby. What made it even more unsettling was that her words were often accurate and sharply tailored to each person.

During the War of Independence, when shells were falling, she took shelter in the same bunker as the Rebbe of Zvhil, Rabbi Gedaliah Moshe Goldman.

When the bombing was intense, she remained quiet. But when it stopped, her verbal attacks resumed.

The people in the shelter could not bear it. They decided that at the next opportunity, they would move her elsewhere. But first, they approached the Rebbe to ask if this was permitted.

“I Am Going to Collect Humiliation”

The Rebbe replied: “Of course you may move her. But before you do, let me tell you a story about my father.”

When they lived in exile, his sister became critically ill. Her fever rose to a life-threatening level, and the doctors said she would not survive.

His father suddenly put on his coat and ran outside. His wife called after him, asking where he was going.

“I am going to collect humiliation,” he replied.

He approached a woman and said something that provoked her. She began shouting at him loudly in public. People gathered around as he stood there absorbing the embarrassment.

Afterward, he returned home and said, “Thank God, she will be fine.” And indeed, the fever broke, and the girl recovered.

After finishing the story, the Rebbe turned to those who had asked him the question and said:

“You are permitted to move this woman. But Hashem has sent her to us as a gift. Through humiliation, a person can be saved from death. Should we give up such a gift now?”

A Different Way to See Life’s Challenges

This teaching offers a completely different perspective.

What feels like insult, discomfort, or embarrassment may actually be a hidden opportunity for spiritual growth, atonement, and even salvation.

Instead of running away from these moments, a person can learn to accept them with strength, silence, and faith, recognizing that even the most difficult experiences may carry the greatest blessings.