10 Practical Tips to Prepare for Shabbat Calmly and Stress Free

Following are ten tips on how to welcome Shabbat calmly. These are taken from a booklet called Shabbat and the Queen from my siddur, Shirat Chayai.

But first of all, prayer. On Friday, when you begin preparing for Shabbat, say this prayer: “Master of peace, King whose peace is His, bless me with peace and remember me, my entire household, and all Your people Israel for a good life and for peace.” Now ask God in your own words to help you, to give you strength, calmness, and joy, and that you merit to prepare in His honor.

1. Start Shabbat early
The earlier you accept Shabbat, the sooner you bring peace into your home. You may think that starting earlier creates more pressure, but the opposite is true. When you decide to begin earlier, you naturally become more focused and efficient, and blessing rests on your time.

It is good to accept Shabbat about ten minutes before the time listed. This is considered a powerful practice. As written in Aruch HaShulchan: “It is a great merit to accept Shabbat early, and fortunate is the one who strives in this mitzvah, for his reward is immeasurable, and Shabbat will advocate on his behalf.”

The Chafetz Chaim would say that people look for special remedies, but all blessings come through Shabbat. One who encourages others to accept Shabbat early will merit righteous children. Rabbi Chaim Kanievsky affirmed that this is not just a “segulah,” but something that truly comes to pass, bringing protection, success in raising children, and abundance.

2. Set the table early
Rabbi Hirsch of Zidichov taught that a home where the table is set before midday on Friday has a special protection from conflict. Try to set the table in the morning, and some even do so the night before. It is also said that this brings great spiritual comfort to one’s parents in the World to Come.

3. Make a list
Prepare a special Friday checklist. When everything is written down and visible, it brings a sense of calm and clarity.

4. Focus only on Shabbat preparations
Avoid dealing with unrelated matters on Friday. Dedicate this special time entirely to preparing for Shabbat.

5. Limit phone use
The phone can be a major distraction. This is not the time to answer every message or call. Turn it off or silence it at least three to four hours before Shabbat.

6. Play Shabbat music
Songs in the background uplift the mood, bring joy, and help everyone enter the Shabbat atmosphere.

7. Plan travel wisely
Avoid long trips late on Friday. It is recommended to plan double the usual travel time and aim to arrive at least an hour before Shabbat begins.

8. Prepare throughout the week
Use the entire week to get ready for Shabbat. Buy or prepare something each day. In winter, when Shabbat comes in early, begin preparing as early as Wednesday.

9. Remember the spirit of Shabbat
Shabbat is a beloved guest who brings holiness and blessing. It does not want you to feel pressured. Prepare with calmness, joy, and a sense of connection to God. Take the word “pressure” (lachatz) and surround it with God’s presence, and it becomes “success” (hatzlacha).

10. Keep it simple
Let go of the pressure to prepare too much. Too many dishes, desserts, and decorations can create unnecessary stress. As it says in Psalms, “Better a little for the righteous than the abundance of many.” It is better to do less with peace than more with tension. Honor Shabbat, but also respect your own limits.

Shabbat Shalom.