Why Violence Among Children and Teenagers Is Rising — And What Parents and Schools Must Change

This Shabbat, we read the Torah portion of Emor. Our Sages taught that every Torah portion carries a direct connection to the events unfolding during that specific time.

Toward the end of the portion appears the verse: “And if a man strikes and kills any human being, he shall surely be put to death.”

At first glance, the connection to the past week seems painfully obvious: Violence.

A Growing Wave of Violence

Violence among children and teenagers has become deeply alarming.

In the past, people spoke about violence as a growing concern. Today, however, it no longer feels like a gradual increase. It feels explosive, dangerous, and at times deadly.

Every day brings new reports of violence involving children, even at very young ages, and certainly among teenagers across all sectors of society.

Many educators fear that we are only at the beginning of a much larger crisis. School dropout rates continue rising. Public spaces increasingly feel unsafe. Schools themselves no longer always feel safe, neither for students nor for educational staff.

So the question becomes unavoidable: What happened to us?

Children Absorb the Atmosphere Around Them

One of the central causes behind violent behavior in children and adolescents lies in the behavioral patterns they experience at home.

The way communication functions inside a family has a profound influence on a child’s emotional and social development.

Children are like sponges and they absorb the atmosphere around them.

Parents are the first and most powerful role models in a child’s life. When children repeatedly witness aggression, bullying, shouting, humiliation, or violent behavior, they internalize the message that force is a legitimate way to deal with frustration and conflict.

Whether the aggression is directed toward a spouse, children, or others, the emotional environment created inside the home deeply shapes the child’s perception of how human relationships work.

When a home feels unstable, frightening, or emotionally unsafe, children often learn that power and intimidation are tools for survival.

The Importance of Healthy Communication

The quality of communication inside the family plays a decisive role.

Respectful, open, emotionally supportive communication creates a sense of belonging and emotional safety. That emotional stability significantly reduces the likelihood of violent behavior.

When communication is dominated by:

• Constant criticism

• Shouting

• Emotional neglect

• Lack of understanding

• Humiliation

• Emotional instability

children often develop deep frustration and emotional pressure that eventually erupts outward.

Sometimes violence develops as a form of self protection. Children who feel powerless, rejected, or emotionally invisible may use aggression to regain a sense of control or strength.

This becomes especially dangerous when children feel that nobody truly sees them, values them, or protects them either at home or at school.

Emotional Neglect and Social Pressure

Social pressure and the broader environment children grow up in also play a major role in escalating violence.

Children and teenagers who lack emotional support, guidance, or proper psychological care can quickly become trapped inside cycles of violence, either as victims or as aggressors.

Another major factor is emotional emptiness and lack of meaningful fulfillment. Many teenagers today feel disconnected, restless, and emotionally lost.

• About 55% of teenagers spend their time wandering aimlessly, searching for identity or belonging.

• Around 25% remain isolated inside screens, technology, and digital entertainment.

• Only a minority are deeply engaged in healthy learning frameworks, hobbies, structure, and meaningful routines.

For many young people, life begins to feel empty.

When a teenager feels they have nothing meaningful to lose, creating chaos sometimes becomes the only remaining way to feel alive, noticed, or emotionally stimulated.

What Can Be Done?

Reducing violence among children and teenagers requires serious attention to the emotional climate inside homes and schools. Parents must become positive role models.

Children need homes built on:

• Respect

• Emotional safety

• Stability

• Healthy communication

• Consistency

• Support

Parents who invest in emotional education and self awareness can help break cycles of aggression and raise children who know healthier ways to resolve conflict.

The Education System Also Needs Change

Choosing the right educational environment for a child is not a secondary issue. It is essential for healthy emotional and social development.

The structure of middle schools that combine wide age ranges during emotionally vulnerable developmental stages which often negatively impacts younger students.

There is an urgent need for:

• Professional and technological educational tracks

• Alternative learning environments

• Systems that recognize different strengths and abilities

• Frameworks not focused exclusively on academic achievement

Not every child will succeed inside the exact same educational model.

The Damage of Constant Pressure

Teachers and students alike often live under constant stress, performance demands, and emotional exhaustion.

This ongoing pressure creates internal emotional strain that can eventually erupt through:

• Emotional breakdowns

• Aggression

• Verbal violence

• Physical violence

A person under chronic stress eventually loses emotional stability.

The Most Important Ingredient: Values

Children need moral and emotional foundations from a young age.

There must be greater investment in education centered around Jewish identity and ethical values, without embarrassment or apology.

It reminds us of the classic Jewish qualities described by the Sages:

• Compassion

• Humility

• Kindness

• Sensitivity toward others

These values must be actively taught, modeled, and lived from early childhood. Without investing deeply in values and emotional character, society will struggle to meaningfully reduce the growing wave of violence.

A Message to Parents

Do not wait for the educational system alone to solve the problem.

Raise your children in environments that actively teach values, emotional health, respect, and human dignity. Ultimately, the emotional and moral atmosphere children grow up inside will shape the kind of adults they become.