Is it Permissible to Give Ma'aser Kesafim to Parents?

Dear,
 
If you have no other way to assist your parents except by using ma'aser funds, and they do not have enough money to cover their basic needs - then not only is this permitted, but you should prioritize them over other poor individuals.

If you are able to assist your parents with other funds that are not ma'aser, then you should not assist them with ma'aser money. However, if every time you give ma'aser you say 'bli neder' (without making a vow), it is permissible.

Sources: As explained that if you have no ability to assist your parents without using ma'aser funds, it is clarified in Shulchan Aruch, Yoreh De'ah (Siman 174, Se'if 3).

And if you can assist them with funds that are not from ma'aser, you should not assist them with ma'aser money, as it is stated in the Gemara, Kiddushin (Page 32a) that a blessing will come to one who feeds his parents with ma'aser from the poor. Indeed, in the responsa of Maharam (Siman 54, 56), it is written in the name of the Mahari Ophrayim that only one who feeds his father and mother with ma'aser from Torah obligation will receive a blessing, but with rabbinic ma'aser, it is praiseworthy and a blessing will come to him without measure. This is also mentioned in his work Likut Yosher, Yoreh De'ah section (published by Machon Yerushalayim, page 68). The same is held in the halacha according to the responsa of Shavet Halevi (Volume 5, Siman 143, Ote 10). However, in the Beit Yosef, Yoreh De'ah (Siman 240), he brought from the responsa of Maharil (Siman 81) that a blessing pertains also to ma'aser money. Likewise, it appears in the responsa of Avkat Rokhel (Siman 3) that it is likewise stated about ma'aser kesafim. It is also clearly stated in the Ramah, Yoreh De'ah (Siman 240, Se'if 5) that if someone has the means, a curse will come to one who supports his father from his own charitable funds. The same view was taken by the responsa of Chasam Sofer (Yoreh De'ah, Siman 271) and in the book Ahavat Chesed, Part 2 (Chapter 19, Section 1).

And as mentioned, and in any case, etc. - this was stated in the name of Rav Elyashiv, zt"l, in the book Asheir Ish, Part 1 (Chapter 48, Section 2).

Now, in the responsa of Tvuot Shmesh (Yoreh De'ah, Siman 62), he wrote that since the entire reason is due to disgrace, then if it is given secretly in a manner that is unknown to his father or to any person, it is permissible. However, in the responsa of Tzitz Eliezer, Volume 14 (Siman 182), he opposes this on the grounds that the disgrace is in relation to the son himself, as giving such to his father from ma'aser funds is itself as if he is showing disrespect toward his father. Therefore, it does not matter whether or not someone knows about it, as the prohibition of disrespect applies even when it is not seen. This is also the opinion of Rav Elyashiv, zt"l, mentioned in the book Asheir Ish there. And see also in the responsa of Shoel U’Meshiv (Volume 6, Siman 170).

Sincerely,

Hillel Meirs