What Should You Do After a Serious Sin? Rabbi Miller's Surprising Advice

Yaakov asks: Is it appropriate for a person to undertake a private fast?

Rabbi Avigdor Miller ztz"l responds:

The topic of private fasts is a broad one, and it is impossible to cover every aspect here. However, there are situations in which a person has sinned, and feels the need to do something tangible that will help him appreciate the seriousness of what he has done and motivate him to correct his ways.

Even so, I would generally recommend a different path.

A Better Alternative

A Jew once called me after committing a very serious sin and asked what he should do to perform teshuvah.

I told him: "Learn the entire Mesilat Yesharim ten times."

"Ten times?" he asked in surprise.

"Yes," I replied. "Ten times. And don't rush through it. Learn it slowly, thoughtfully, and carefully."

In my opinion, studying Mesilat Yesharim ten times is more beneficial than taking on a private fast.

The purpose of teshuvah is not merely to feel regret. It is to grow, improve, and transform oneself. Deep, consistent study of a sefer devoted to character refinement and spiritual growth can help a person achieve exactly that.

Why Do People Fast?

At the same time, there are people who are not prepared to undertake such a serious commitment to learning. They feel a need for some kind of penalty or sacrifice that will make them sense that they have lost something because of their actions.

That is one of the ideas behind fasting.

When a person goes without food for a day, he experiences a small measure of loss. He missed breakfast. He missed lunch. He gave up something he wanted.

Of course, the damage caused by a sin is far greater than the loss of a meal. But the fast serves as a tangible reminder that wrongdoing carries consequences. It helps a person feel, in a practical way, that he has lost something because of his actions.

The Goal Is Growth

For that reason, there can be value in a private fast when it is undertaken for the sake of teshuvah.

Nevertheless, Rabbi Miller emphasizes that a person will often gain far more from sincere Torah study and self-improvement than from physical deprivation alone.

A fast may create awareness, but learning can create lasting change.

That is why he recommends immersing oneself in Mesilat Yesharim, a sefer dedicated to spiritual growth, character development, and drawing closer to Hashem. Through consistent study and reflection, a person can achieve the true goal of teshuvah: becoming a better version of himself.