The Art of Constructive Criticism: A Lesson That Changes Everything

From the book Halachah Lemaaseh by Rabbi Yaron Ashkenazi, based on the rulings of Rabbi Ovadia Yosef.

If Someone Eats an Olive-Sized Portion of Bread Over an Extended Period, Should They Recite Birkat Hamazon?

The halachic authorities disagree on whether a person who eats an olive-sized portion (kezayit) of bread over a period longer than the halachic time limit for eating is obligated to recite Birkat Hamazon.

Because of this uncertainty, if possible, one should eat an additional kezayit of bread within the halachic time limit for eating, thereby removing any doubt.

If that is not possible, one should not recite the full Birkat Hamazon because of the uncertainty. Instead, it should be recited without mentioning God's Name and Kingship, while mentally contemplating those words.

If Several of the Seven Species Are Present, Which Fruit Should Be Blessed First?

If wheat or barley products that require the Mezonot blessing are present, they take precedence and should be blessed first.

After that, the order of priority among the Seven Species is:

1. Olives

2. Dates

3. Grapes

4. Figs

5. Pomegranates

Thus, if olives are available, they should be blessed first. If not, dates take precedence, followed by grapes, then figs, and finally pomegranates.

Daily Inspiration

Everyone Can Criticize. Few Can Improve.

A young man had just completed his studies in art and wanted to test his abilities as a painter.

He created a detailed painting and displayed it on an easel in a busy shopping mall. Beneath it he placed a sign that read:

"I am a beginning artist and would appreciate your feedback. If you notice any mistake in the proportions, colors, or composition, please use the black marker provided below and place an X on the area you believe needs improvement."

The next day he returned to see the results.

His heart sank.

The painting was covered with X marks. There were so many that almost no part of the canvas remained untouched.

Embarrassed and discouraged, he took the painting down and thought to himself, Perhaps I have no future as an artist.

He brought the painting to his teacher and described what had happened.

The teacher asked him, "Can you paint the exact same picture again?"

"Of course," the student replied, and immediately set to work.

Three days later, the second painting was finished. It was virtually identical to the first.

This time, the teacher accompanied him to a different shopping mall. They displayed the painting with a similar sign, but with one important difference.

Instead of asking people to point out mistakes, the sign read:

"I am a beginning artist and would appreciate your feedback. If you notice anything that could be improved, please feel free to correct it yourself. I have provided paints and brushes for your use."

The next day the young artist eagerly returned.

No one had touched the painting.

A week passed. Nothing.

A month later, the painting was exactly as they had left it.

The teacher smiled and said, "Do you see the difference? Almost everyone knows how to point out what is wrong. But very few people know how to fix it."

A Lesson for Everyday Life

Before offering criticism, we must remember this story.

Constructive criticism is far more valuable than simply pointing out faults. When feedback is delivered with sensitivity, respect, and practical suggestions for improvement, it is far more likely to be accepted and to inspire real change.

The goal should never be merely to identify what is wrong, but to help another person grow and succeed.