When Serving Hashem Feels Hard: Why the Struggle Matters

At synagogue, someone sits beside you looking refreshed. They arrived on time, seemingly without a struggle. Meanwhile, you spent 20 minutes fighting with yourself under the covers just to make it to the exact same place.

The question almost asks itself: If it is so easy for them, maybe they are simply a better servant of Hashem than I am?

Most people instinctively think of difficulty as the price we pay along the way. If something took more effort, then we simply paid a higher price to achieve the same result.

The Mishnah, however, teaches something very different.

“Lefum tza’ara agra” (Pirkei Avot 5:23).

The Bartenura explains: “According to the amount of hardship you endure in studying Torah and performing a mitzvah, so will your reward be greater.”

The Tosafot Yom Tov adds: “And this is the reward for the hardship and effort themselves... but regarding the reward for the mitzvot themselves, you do not know their reward.”

In other words, there are two separate rewards. There is the reward for the mitzvah itself, which we cannot measure or calculate. And then there is an additional reward for the effort.

The implication is powerful. Your struggle is not simply the price you pay for the mitzvah. It is not an admission fee you have to get through before the mitzvah begins. The effort itself counts.

Imagine two people arriving at synagogue at the same time and sitting beside each other. One lives in the building next door and walked down three flights of stairs. The other walked several miles to get there. Both arrived. Both pray. But only one made that long journey, and the effort of that journey stands on its own. It was not erased the moment he sat down. It was not wasted time spent getting to the “real” mitzvah.

It counted too.

What This Looks Like in Everyday Life

• Someone needs to review a passage of Gemara five times to understand what their friend grasped after reading it once. That does not make them a worse student. Every additional effort has value.
• Someone gives tzedakah while worried about their bank balance. The amount may be the same as someone else’s donation, but the effort and sacrifice are not.
• Someone comes to a Torah class after an exhausting day at work and struggles to keep their eyes open. They are not simply “getting less” out of the class. Their effort to be there has value of its own.
• Someone was born with a hot temper and spends years working on their anger, while their friend is naturally calm and rarely becomes angry. Today, neither one loses their temper. But only one had to build themselves to reach that point.

What to Remember When Serving Hashem Feels Hard

The measure is not only where you are. It is also how far you had to travel to get there.

Do not measure yourself against someone whose path may be easier. You cannot see the starting point from which another person began, just as they cannot see yours. The effort you invested along the way matters.

Difficulty is not necessarily a sign of failure. Sometimes it is evidence that you are doing something that requires genuine growth. Climbing takes more effort than standing still.

And when something feels especially difficult, do what you can. One verse learned when you are exhausted may require more effort than much more learning on a day when you feel energized. A small mitzvah performed through struggle can contain an enormous amount of work.

So when you find yourself wondering, “Why is this so hard specifically for me?” remember lefum tza’ara agra: according to the effort is the reward.

The person beside you may have reached the same destination more easily. That does not diminish your struggle. The effort it took you to get there is not lost.

It counts.