Rachel Imeinu’s Hilula

The 11th of Cheshvan marks the hilula of Rachel Imeinu — Mama Rachel, the mother who has cried and prayed for her children throughout our long and sometimes bitter exile.

On this special day, take a few moments to light a candle in her memory, give tzedakah, and speak to Hashem in your own words. Ask for whatever is sitting on your heart — for yourself, your family, and all of Am Yisrael.

But perhaps one of the most powerful ways to connect to Rachel Imeinu is to discover what made her Rachel Imeinu — and to carry a little of her extraordinary middot into our own lives.

What Was Rachel Imeinu’s Greatest Strength?

There are four Imahot — Sarah, Rivkah, Rachel and Leah. Bilhah and Zilpah also became mothers of the tribes of Israel.

Yet there is something unique about the way generations of Jews speak about Rachel: Rachel Imeinu. Mama Rachel.

Why?

Perhaps the answer can be found in one night that changed the course of her entire life.

Yaakov loved Rachel. He worked seven long years to marry her. The Torah tells us that those years seemed like only a few days because of his love for her.

Finally, the wedding day arrived.

Rachel should have been walking toward the future she had waited for.

But she knew what her father Lavan was planning.

Leah would be brought to Yaakov instead.

Rachel could have stopped it.

She could have said, Yaakov worked for me. This is my wedding. This is my future. This is not fair.

And she would have been right.

But Rachel knew something else: without the secret signs that she and Yaakov had arranged, Leah would be discovered — and humiliated.

So Rachel made an almost unimaginable choice.

She gave Leah the signs.

Think about that for a moment.

Rachel did not know how her story would end. She did not know that she would eventually marry Yaakov too. In that moment, she was willing to place her own future on the line rather than watch her sister suffer humiliation.

She had every right to insist on what belonged to her.

Instead, she chose mercy.

Rachel went lifnim mishurat hadin — beyond what strict justice demanded.

And generations later, that act of mercy would become one of Rachel Imeinu’s most powerful arguments on behalf of us.

The Mother Who Still Cries for Us

Our Sages describe Rachel pleading before Hashem for Am Yisrael.

And now her sacrifice takes on an entirely new meaning.

Rachel can stand before Hashem, so to speak, and say:

I had every reason to insist on what was mine — and I let it go for someone else. I chose mercy over strict justice. Please, Hashem, do the same for Your children.

And Hashem answers Rachel.

This is the power of Rachel Imeinu.

And perhaps this is one of the greatest lessons we can take on her hilula.

Someone hurt you.

Someone disappointed you.

Someone treated you unfairly.

And maybe you really are right.

But there are moments when we can choose not to demand everything we are entitled to. We can forgive. We can remain silent. We can choose peace. We can give someone another chance.

Our Sages teach that one who overlooks offenses committed against him has his own offenses overlooked by Heaven.

Imagine being able to come before Hashem and say:

Hashem, it was difficult for me, but I let it go. I showed mercy when I could have demanded justice. Please show that same mercy to me.

Your Yeshuah Is Not Someone Else’s Story

There is another lesson hidden in Rachel’s life — one that can speak directly to anyone waiting for a salvation.

Rachel watched the people around her receive the very blessing she desperately wanted.

Leah had children. Bilhah and Zilpah had children.

Rachel remained childless.

How easy would it have been to look around and ask:

Why her and not me?

Why has her tefillah been answered while I am still waiting?

We all know that feeling.

Someone else easily receives the blessing you have been praying and begging for. Someone else reaches the milestone you are still waiting to reach. And suddenly their happiness can make your own waiting hurt even more.

Rachel Imeinu teaches us another way.

Someone else’s blessing does not take away from the blessing Hashem has prepared for you.

Your task is not to measure your life against theirs.

Your task is to turn toward Hashem.

Rachel did — and then came the words she had waited so long for:

“And G-d remembered Rachel; G-d listened to her and opened her womb.”

Rachel was blessed with Yosef and later Binyamin.

She teaches us to develop an ayin tovah: to genuinely wish others well, even when they have received what we ourselves are still waiting for.

Someone else received the yeshuah you wanted?

Bless them.

Be truly happy for them.

And then turn back to Hashem and keep praying.

Their story is theirs. Your story is between you and Hashem.

5 Things to Do on Rachel Imeinu’s Hilula

On the 11th of Cheshvan, consider doing these five things in honor of Rachel Imeinu:

1. Light a candle in memory of Rachel Imeinu.

2. Give tzedakah in her merit.

3. Pray for your yeshuah. Speak to Hashem in your own words. Tell Him what you need, what hurts, what you are waiting for, and what you hope will change. Pray for your family and for all of Am Yisrael as well.

4. Practice an ayin tovah. Think of someone who has received a blessing you are still waiting for, and genuinely wish them well. Then remind yourself: Their blessing does not take away from mine.

5. Go beyond the strict letter of the law. Think of one situation in which you could insist that you are right — but instead choose forgiveness, mercy, or peace.  

Perhaps this is one of the most meaningful and powerful ways to connect to Rachel Imeinu on her hilula.

Not only by lighting a candle for Mama Rachel.

But by becoming, in some small way, more like her.

And then we can turn to Hashem and ask:

Hashem, I tried to look favorably at another person. Please look favorably at me.

I chose mercy when I could have chosen strict justice. Please judge me with mercy.

I celebrated someone else’s blessing while still waiting for mine. Please remember me too — just as You remembered Rachel.

May the prayers of Rachel Imeinu continue to stand before Hashem on behalf of all her children.

May every person waiting for a yeshuah receive the answer they have been praying for, with revealed goodness and heavenly mercy.

May this be the final hilula of Rachel Imeinu that we commemorate while still in exile, and may we merit the coming of Mashiach and the complete redemption of Am Yisrael, speedily in our days.

Amen.