Why Kindness Was the Key to Finding Yitzchak's Wife

"Hashem, God of my master Avraham, please cause it to happen before me today, and show kindness to my master Avraham. Behold, I am standing beside the water spring, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. Let it be that the young woman to whom I say, 'Please lower your pitcher so that I may drink,' and who replies, 'Drink, and I will also give your camels water,' she is the one You have designated for Your servant Yitzchak. Through her, I will know that You have shown kindness to my master" (Genesis 24:12–14).

Following Sarah's burial, Avraham Avinu seeks to find a suitable wife for his son Yitzchak. He entrusts this important mission to his servant, Eliezer, who sets out for Aram Naharayim with ten camels. Along the way, Eliezer turns to Hashem in prayer, asking for Divine assistance in identifying the right woman for Yitzchak.

A Prayer That Begins and Ends with Kindness

Rabbeinu Bachya draws attention to a striking detail in Eliezer's prayer: it begins and ends with a request for kindness. Eliezer opens by asking Hashem to "show kindness to my master Avraham" and concludes with the words, "Through her, I will know that You have shown kindness to my master." As Rabbeinu Bachya explains, "The servant opened his prayer with kindness and concluded it with kindness, as he said, 'Through her, I will know that You have shown kindness to my master.'"

Rabbeinu Bachya further explains the meaning of Eliezer's words, "She is the one You have designated for Your servant Yitzchak." Eliezer understood that the woman who would voluntarily offer water not only to him but also to his camels would demonstrate an exceptional capacity for kindness. Such a woman would be a fitting match for Yitzchak because she possessed the very quality that defined Avraham's household.

In the words of Rabbeinu Bachya, "She [Rivkah] is worthy of him [Yitzchak] because she performs acts of kindness, and she is worthy of entering the household of Avraham."

The Quality That Would Continue Avraham's Legacy

Rabbeinu Bachya emphasizes that Eliezer was undoubtedly a man of great wisdom and Torah knowledge. Having been raised in Avraham's household, he had absorbed his master's teachings and values. He understood that chesed, loving-kindness, was the defining characteristic of Avraham Avinu, and he therefore made it the central theme of his prayer.

As Rabbeinu Bachya writes, "There is no doubt that because he was raised in Avraham's household, he was exceedingly wise in Torah and wisdom. He knew that this was Avraham's defining attribute, and therefore he prayed through it."

Eliezer's prayer reveals that his search was about far more than finding a suitable bride. He was seeking someone who embodied the values upon which Avraham had built his home. Kindness was not simply a desirable quality in Yitzchak's future wife. It was the essential characteristic that would make her worthy of continuing Avraham's legacy.