Sarah's Secret to Happiness: How Faith in Hashem Changes Everything

The Torah portions describing the lives of our patriarchs and matriarchs are filled with profound lessons in emunah (faith) and bitachon (trust in Hashem). Through the experiences of Avraham, Yitzchak, Yaakov, Sarah, Rivkah, Rachel, and Leah, we discover what it means to trust in Divine Providence, even when life takes unexpected and difficult turns.

One particularly powerful lesson emerges from the opening verse of Parshat Chayei Sarah: "And the life of Sarah was one hundred years and twenty years and seven years; these were the years of Sarah's life" (Genesis 23:1). Commenting on the concluding phrase, Rashi explains that all of Sarah's years were equally good.

At first glance, this statement is difficult to understand. Sarah endured extraordinary hardships throughout her life. She experienced famine twice, was taken into the households of Pharaoh and Avimelech, and remained childless until the age of ninety. The Talmud (Nedarim 64b) even teaches that a person without children is considered as though dead, emphasizing the profound pain that childlessness can entail. How, then, could Rashi describe all 127 years of Sarah's life as equally good? Surely some periods were filled with greater happiness and blessing than others.

Finding Happiness Despite Life's Challenges

Ordinarily, life's difficulties take a toll on a person's emotional and physical well-being. Financial pressures, personal disappointments, family responsibilities, and the countless worries of daily life can leave us feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. Over time, these burdens can affect our outlook and diminish our sense of joy.

Sarah, however, possessed an extraordinary level of faith that transformed the way she experienced life's challenges. Despite everything she endured, she remained deeply connected to Hashem, trusting that His guidance was always directed toward her ultimate good. Her happiness was not dependent on everything unfolding according to her wishes. Instead, it came from the conviction that she was constantly under Hashem's care.

The Torah's expression "the years of Sarah's life" therefore carries a deeper significance. Sarah did not merely exist throughout her 127 years; she truly lived them. Even during the years of famine, her frightening experiences in Pharaoh's and Avimelech's households, and her long wait for a child, Sarah believed that Hashem was guiding her circumstances in the best possible way. Because she viewed every experience through the lens of faith, she maintained a sense of spiritual vitality and inner peace that was not dependent on external circumstances.

Were Sarah's Years Before and After Yitzchak's Birth Really Equal?

And yet, a deeper question remains. Even if Sarah possessed extraordinary faith and accepted her circumstances with joy, how could the years before Yitzchak's birth possibly be considered equal to those that followed?

For ninety years, Sarah longed for a child. She prayed, hoped, and waited for the fulfillment of this deeply cherished dream. When Yitzchak was finally born, her life changed dramatically. Surely the years after his birth were happier and more fulfilling than those that preceded it. How, then, could Rashi insist that all her years were equally good?

The answer lies in understanding the source of Sarah's happiness. Her joy did not begin when Yitzchak was born. It was already present throughout the years when she remained childless because her happiness came primarily from her relationship with Hashem. She certainly desired a child and prayed fervently for one, yet her longing did not diminish her trust in Divine Providence. She believed that if Hashem had not yet granted her a child, His wisdom determined that this was what was best for her at that time.

Her faith did not eliminate her desire for motherhood. Rather, it allowed her to continue living with joy even while that desire remained unfulfilled. When Yitzchak was born, Sarah experienced the extraordinary happiness of becoming a mother, but the foundation of her inner contentment remained unchanged. Before his birth and afterward, she lived with the same profound trust in Hashem. The circumstances of her life changed dramatically, but her connection to Hashem remained constant.

This is the deeper meaning of Rashi's statement that all her years were equally good. Sarah's happiness was rooted in something that remained steadfast throughout every stage of her life.

True Happiness Comes From Closeness to Hashem

Sarah's extraordinary faith reflects the verse, "But you who cling to Hashem your God are all alive today" (Deuteronomy 4:4). A person who remains deeply connected to Hashem experiences life differently. Rather than measuring happiness exclusively through accomplishments, possessions, or the fulfillment of personal desires, such a person recognizes that the greatest source of goodness is closeness to the Creator.

As King David declares, "But as for me, the nearness of God is my good" (Psalms 73:28). Sarah embodied this principle throughout her life. She lived with an awareness of Hashem's presence, trusting that every moment was guided by His wisdom. Her connection to Him brought meaning and joy even during periods of uncertainty and disappointment.

This also sheds light on the Torah's repeated expression, "the years of Sarah's life." Her years were not merely a record of how long she lived, but a testimony to how she lived: with constant faith, spiritual awareness, and devotion to Hashem. Her life reflected the words of King David, "I have placed Hashem before me always" (Psalms 16:8). By keeping Hashem constantly in her awareness, Sarah reached an extraordinary level of spiritual purity, remaining steadfast in her service of Him throughout her 127 years.

The teaching also offers a deeper perspective on the Talmudic statement that a person without children is considered as though dead. While this statement reflects the tremendous significance of having children and the profound pain that may accompany childlessness, Sarah's life demonstrates that a person's spiritual vitality and happiness need not depend entirely on parenthood.

Even before Yitzchak's birth, Sarah lived a deeply meaningful life. Her relationship with Hashem was a constant source of purpose, fulfillment, and joy. Throughout Jewish history, several revered Torah scholars were themselves childless, yet their lives were filled with spiritual accomplishment and devotion to Hashem. Among them were the Chazon Ish, Rabbi Mordechai Sharabi, and the Lubavitcher Rebbe. Their lives illustrate that a person's spiritual legacy and capacity for fulfillment are not limited to having biological descendants.

This reflects the verse, "But I have trusted in Your kindness; my heart shall rejoice in Your salvation" (Psalms 13:6). The source of joy described here is not the certainty that every personal wish will be fulfilled, but the confidence that Hashem's kindness remains present even when His plans are beyond our understanding.

Trusting That Hashem Knows What Is Best

The foundation of this outlook is the belief that Hashem's guidance is always directed toward our ultimate good. In our prayers, we describe Hashem as the One whose mercy never ceases. His compassion is constant, and He knows precisely what each person needs at every stage of life.

From our limited perspective, certain circumstances may appear painful, disappointing, or unfair. We may struggle to understand why something we desperately want remains beyond our reach. Yet faith teaches us that Hashem sees the complete picture, including realities and considerations that are hidden from us. If something has not yet been granted, it may be because, at this particular moment, it is not what is ultimately best for us.

This does not mean that our prayers are unnecessary or that our circumstances cannot change. On the contrary, prayer is an essential part of our relationship with Hashem. Through prayer, a person can grow spiritually, become more receptive to Divine blessing, and seek additional mercy.

Something that was not appropriate for a person at one stage of life may become appropriate later. This does not imply that Hashem has changed His mind. As Scripture states, "God is not a man that He should lie, nor a son of man that He should relent" (Numbers 23:19). Rather, the person's circumstances or spiritual state may have changed, making it appropriate for Hashem to grant what was previously withheld.

The central message is that whatever Hashem has chosen for us at a particular moment is, according to this teaching, the most beneficial arrangement for us at that time, even if we cannot yet understand why.

Learning to Find Joy in the Present

Imagine someone asking, "How are you feeling?" From the perspective of this teaching, the ideal response would be, "Wonderful. I am truly happy." Such a response does not necessarily mean that everything in the person's life is easy or that there are no problems to overcome. Rather, it reflects a deep conviction that Hashem is guiding their life with wisdom and compassion.

Of course, reaching this level of faith is no simple matter. When we encounter hardship, our natural response may be disappointment, anxiety, or sadness. Developing genuine trust in Hashem is a lifelong spiritual process, and Sarah's extraordinary level of faith represents an ideal toward which we can strive. Her example teaches us that happiness need not be postponed until every problem has been resolved or every hope fulfilled. We can continue praying for what we need while recognizing the goodness and meaning already present in our lives. As King David declares, "For in Him our hearts shall rejoice, because we have trusted in His holy name" (Psalms 33:21).

Ultimately, Sarah's greatness lay not in having an easy life, but in the unwavering faith with which she lived it. Whether she was facing hardship or experiencing extraordinary blessing, her trust in Hashem remained constant. The lesson of Sarah's life is that true happiness comes not from having everything we desire, but from trusting Hashem even when life unfolds differently from what we hoped.