The Secret of True Kindness: What Rivkah Teaches Us About Generosity

When Eliezer, Avraham's servant, set out to find a wife for Yitzchak, he asked Hashem for a sign that would help him identify the right woman: "And let it be that the young woman to whom I say, 'Please lower your pitcher so that I may drink,' and she replies, 'Drink, and I will also give your camels water,' she is the one You have designated for Your servant Yitzchak. Through her I will know that You have shown kindness to my master" (Genesis 24:14).

Why did Eliezer choose this particular test? Rashi explains that he was looking for a young woman whose generosity would make her worthy of joining Avraham's household. By voluntarily offering water not only to Eliezer but also to his camels, she would demonstrate that she possessed the quality of gemilut chasadim, acts of kindness. As Rashi writes, "She is worthy of him because she performs acts of kindness, and she is fit to enter the household of Avraham."

What Money Reveals About a Person's Character

The Kli Yakar offers a fascinating explanation for why the account of Eliezer's mission immediately follows the story of Avraham purchasing the Cave of Machpelah from Ephron the Hittite as a burial place for Sarah. Ephron, a descendant of Canaan, exemplified the opposite of generosity. Although he initially appeared willing to give Avraham the burial site, he ultimately demanded an enormous payment of four hundred silver shekels. Rashi describes him as someone who "spoke much but did not do even a little" (Genesis 23:16).

According to the Kli Yakar, a person's attitude toward money is one of the clearest indicators of character. Just as silver and gold are tested through refining, a person's integrity is revealed through financial dealings. Citing the verse, "A refining pot is for silver and a furnace for gold" (Proverbs 17:3), he explains that money serves as a test of one's moral qualities. Someone who remains honest, fair, and generous when personal financial interests are at stake demonstrates genuine strength of character, while greed and selfishness expose weaknesses that might otherwise remain hidden.

Ephron's conduct revealed a selfish and calculating approach to wealth. Eliezer, by contrast, sought a woman whose qualities were the very opposite: someone with a generous spirit, a compassionate heart, and a natural desire to help others.

Why Eliezer Tested Rivkah Through Kindness

The Kli Yakar explains that Eliezer understood the defining quality of Avraham's household to be kindness. He therefore designed a test that would reveal whether a prospective bride shared that commitment. Rather than asking for an elaborate favor, Eliezer requested only a drink of water, leaving the young woman free to decide whether to offer anything more.

If she voluntarily offered to water his camels as well, Eliezer would know that her generosity extended beyond what was expected of her. As the Kli Yakar explains, her willingness to give more than she was asked would demonstrate that she was truly compassionate and therefore worthy of joining a household devoted to helping others.

The contrast between Ephron and Rivkah highlights a fundamental lesson about human character. While Ephron's financial dealings exposed his self-interest, Rivkah's response to a stranger's simple request revealed her extraordinary generosity. True kindness is not merely about fulfilling our obligations, but about recognizing opportunities to give more than what is asked of us.