Faith
When Is a Woman Forbidden to Her Husband?
Question
I am a little confused about exactly when a woman becomes forbidden to her husband. On the one hand, if she violates the laws of Moshe and Yehudit, she leaves without her ketubah. On the other hand, a woman is not forbidden to her husband except through kinuy and setirah. On a third hand, even without kinuy, she is forbidden to both her husband and the man with whom she was involved. If the rabbis, pardon the trouble, could please sort these matters out, I would be very grateful.
Answer
Shalom and blessings,
There are several ways in halacha in which a person is commanded or required to divorce his wife, and there is no contradiction between these matters, as follows -
A. If a woman violates the laws of Moshe and Yehudit, he is commanded to divorce her (Shulchan Aruch, Even HaEzer, siman 115, seif 4), even without any kinuy and setirah or relations with another man.
B. If there was kinuy and setirah, meaning that he said to his wife in the presence of two witnesses, Do not seclude yourself with so-and-so, and afterward she secluded herself in the presence of witnesses with the same man about whom he had warned her, and remained there long enough for tumah, she is forbidden to her husband (there, siman 178, seifim 1, 2, 4), even if in fact she did not have relations.
C. If she had relations with another man, she is forbidden to her husband, even if there was no kinuy and setirah.
All of this is only in brief, but of course in each of these cases there are many detailed halachic questions about exactly when one is commanded and required to divorce her.
With blessings,
Hillel Meirs
