What Your Words Reveal About You: A Lesson on Lashon Hara

Two halachot a day from the book Halacha Lemaaseh, by Rabbi Yaron Ashkenazi, based on the rulings of Rabbi Ovadia Yosef.

Can someone who has already recited Birkat Halevanah (blessing the moon) recite it again in order to fulfill another person’s obligation?

Since some authorities maintain that Birkat Halevanah is a blessing of praise, and the principle that “one who has already fulfilled his obligation may fulfill the obligation of another” does not apply to blessings of praise, each person should recite the blessing individually and cannot fulfill the obligation by listening to another person’s blessing.

When teaching a child how to recite blessings, is it permissible to pronounce Hashem’s Name as part of the blessing?

When this is done for the purpose of educating a child, it is permitted to recite Hashem’s Name as part of the blessing, even if the person teaching the child will not actually eat or drink after reciting that blessing.

Daily Quote

“Be very careful, my son, to avoid lashon hara, for by speaking it you bring shame upon yourself. For anyone who finds fault in others is himself flawed. Such a person does not speak of the good in the world, but tends to find fault with others through his own shortcomings. The flaw within him remains in his heart throughout the day, and because it is in his heart, it eventually comes out through his mouth.”

- Orchot Tzaddikim, Gate of Lashon Hara

Understanding the Quote

Orchot Tzaddikim warns us against speaking lashon hara because doing so does not only harm other people. It also affects the person who speaks it. When someone constantly speaks negatively about others, his words may reveal something about his own inner weaknesses.

The passage is based on an important principle: a person who habitually criticizes and finds fault with others may actually be revealing flaws within himself. Rather than focusing on the goodness in the world and in other people, he repeatedly notices and speaks about what is wrong. In doing so, he may be expressing the very shortcomings with which he himself struggles.

This is the meaning of the teaching, “Anyone who disqualifies another does so with his own flaw.” The faults that occupy a person’s heart can eventually find their way into his speech.

This teaches us about the close connection between the words that come out of our mouths and what is taking place within our hearts. If we find ourselves constantly criticizing others or speaking negatively about them, it can be an invitation to look inward and consider what may need to be refined within ourselves.

Instead of focusing on the shortcomings of others, we can train ourselves to look at people with a more generous eye, notice their good qualities, and invest our energy in improving ourselves rather than diminishing someone else.